Slowing Down

Posted by Morgan

I came across this picture today while I was looking for a new background for my computer, and when I saw it, I immediately set it as my background. As I closed iPhoto, I began to actually look at the picture that I had taken over a year ago, and the following is what came to my mind.

The focus of the picture is on the tree, and the blurry brown in front is the fence that did not focus because we were driving at top Brazilian speed, which is way faster than most Americans drive. I really like this. It made me think of how life is sometimes. How we can be going so fast trying to get a good look at everything, that we generally miss the neat stuff that is there for us to see. It's kind of where I am in life right now. I'm so sick of school. I really just don't enjoy school at all. I would have liked to have been done about a week ago.


God used this picture to remind me to slow down and be where I am. Yes, be looking at the big picture, but don't miss the details. The details and the little things in life are important. And yes I am well aware that the previous sentence is entirely a cliche, but it's true. I have got to slow down. I think I'm so busy trying to get somewhere that I could very possibly be missing what God has for me here and now. 

If we are so busy trying to get through life we won't ever really enjoy life. 


Singing Harmony,
Morgan

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Living

Posted by Morgan
I don't really know why but I've just had so many thing I want to put on paper (or in this case, page) lately. I was listening to the new Phil Whickham CD just a little while ago, and I was listening to Heaven Song, which if you haven't heard it, you should go listen to it because it is simply amazing. 

The song talks about how we can't wait to get to Heaven and sing with the angels, and sing your Heaven song, hence the name of the song. And in light of everything that is going on in my brain right now it got me thinking about all of the following: living with only Christ in mind, living without restraint of what people think, and well, living. Just plain old living. But that's just it. As Christians we don't have "just plain old living". Being a Christian, being called to a life that is set apart and different isn't plain at all. It's exhilarating. It's amazing. It's hard, but it's worth it. 

When people see me, hear me speak, see me serve, watch me when I don't know they are, do they see Jesus? Do they see someone who is shining a light into this world? Because that is the cry of my heart. It truly is. I want to be a light for Jesus. A light to this world. I want to walk around and people to see Jesus. I do not want to conform to the ways of the culture. I want to get out of the stuff that is so "culturally acceptable"...but is not something that will set me apart as a Christian.

There are several people in my life that I love and respect so much that have this amazing quality. They don't speak excessively, but only when necessary. And when they speak, people listen, because it is worth listening to. It's amazing. I want to be one of those people. Because as a Christian I want to speak love, grace, mercy, peace, and Jesus to people. But if my words do not show that I am living my life for Christ, who will listen to me when I am speaking about those things? I certainly wouldn't.

I want to live a consistent life for Christ. I want to press in and know Him more. I want to know HIS heart, HIS desires, HIS plan for me. All of these words and nice and pretty, but if I don't do anything about this, it's pointless. And again, no one will listen. Consistent Christian living...here we go. 

He MUST become more and I MUST become less.

Singing Harmony,
Morgan 
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Worship

Posted by Morgan
I don't normally do posts so close together, but due to the things that have been going through my brain in the last 48 hours, it has called for another post. So here we go!

I've been thinking a lot about what motivations, actions, and intentions drive what we do. More specifically related to the worship side of Christian living, why do I worship Christ the way that I do? Because worship is a lifestyle, I should be worshiping Him with the very life that I am living. In church this morning I began to question why I was raising my hands and closing my eyes, what was my motivation? Was it so that everyone around me knew I was worshiping? Was it for show? Or did the physical actions of my body come from an overflow of love in my heart for Christ? 

I found myself very puzzled by this and it caused me to stop and be silent in still before the Lord. I found that there truly is a time for both. A time to be silent and still before the Lord and also a time to dance and lift your hands. Now while I've always known this in my head, it was something that just seemed to click today.

So from this thought process came another: what about my actions in every day life? Why do I do what I do? Why am I in school? Why do I wear the clothes I do? Why do I order the things I do when I'm out to eat? Why do I say what I do? I began to wonder if my actions ever change according to my surroundings, and if so, is that okay? Shouldn't I be me all the time? Of course.

I think that's something I'm coming to grasp more fully: who I am in Christ. My identity is in Him. I am a daughter of the most high King, um hi, that's a pretty big deal! But guess what! You are too!!! How cool is that? God created me AND you just the way He wanted, and yes, He wants to refine us and grow us to be more like Him. But who we are, the part of us that make us US, God created and loves. Isn't that neat? I thought so. :)


Singing Harmony,
Morgan
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...untitled, unfinished, and FREE!

Posted by Morgan
I've found that no matter how hard I try, I cannot title my post until after I have finished writing it. Whenever I start off with a title I feel very boxed in. It's almost like I have no freedom to write what I want, I feel that I must stick to the subject that is in that little box up above. It's like the title of the post is the goal for that post, what it's supposed to talk about or accomplish. But when I don't put a title, I feel like I can write whatever comes to my mind, it's this freedom that really can't be fully explained. Now, yes I may have an idea of what I want to write, or God can completely change what's on my heart and something so much better than I imaged can be the outcome.


I kind of feel like that's what we do with our lives. We title them. We box ourselves in to this list of things or a theme that we want to stick to and we get caught up in that instead of actually living out our lives. It's like when we plan out how with think our lives will go, just to find out that God has a completely different plan for us. And let's be honest here, no matter how much we say we don't plan our lives, we at least have an idea of where we hope they will go. But God changes that.

I've found that in my life, if I try to plan, generally what happens is the exact opposite of what I planned. Let's give a few examples, shall we? Okay, first I was dead set on going to college right out of high school and I was completely against a gap year. What did I end up doing? A gap year. When I finally came around and got on board with the gap year I wanted to take that time and really figure out what God wanted me to do with my life, more specifically want I wanted to major in during college. Did He show me what my passions are and what I want to do with my life? Yes. Can those be translated to a college degree? Well if you find a college that let's you take How to be a Good Wife and Mother 101, please inform me. I set out to Lee planning on nailing down a major my first semester here. It's second semester now....and what does it say on my record: UNDECIDED. 

So here is what I have learned: STOP THE PLANNING. It's frustrating and it's pointless. God will show you the plan when you need to know it. Be listening for it, be waiting for it, but don't rush it. It'll get you know where. God doesn't respond to the 5 year-old technique of tugging at a parents pants until they give you their full attention and you get the answer you want. He waits patiently for you to release your life and plans to him, and then slowly but surely he will show you.

Be expectant for what God is bringing, but don't be impatient. And be content with where God has you, but not complacent and think that where you are is good enough. Stay in a place of expectancy and contentment, not one of impatience and complacency.

Singing Harmony,
Morgan

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Reflections....

Posted by Morgan
So the first semester is almost over....when did that happen?! I'm pretty sure this has flown by....but the next 2 days are going to take forEVER. No joke.

Well, this weekend I got to go spend time with the one and only Katy Thompson, Lyndsay, and 3 of the current students, Charles, Nate, and Kim. :) It was basically fantastic. It was so cool to talk with them about IMPACT and the things they are learning, about Brazil, and everything I had learned. I'm pretty sure I haven't talked that much in a long time because I ended up losing my voice, great huh? :)

I can't believe how long ago it actually was from when I was in their place....I remember it so clearly and at the same time it feels like it's a million years behind me. I can't believe how much I've grown since a year and a half ago.....crazy isn't?

:)

Singing Harmony,

Morgan
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The Beauty of Love

Posted by Morgan
I had to write something for my humanities class, and I have no idea if I am completely off base on this, and it's entirely possible, and probable actually, that I am. So I would love your feedback, negative and positive.


The Beauty of Love
            Who is to say that true love is something few can experience? Love is something that everyone desires. Look at what modern culture promotes: power, money, fame, and love. While those things, according to our culture, are great, they are nothing without love. So how is someone to acquire love, and furthermore, who is to say what love truly is? Who has the ultimate say on what love is? God is love. So how does someone find that love? His love is reflected in his creation, and the ability to reflect on that is innately human. The ability to love, and appreciate love is, also, innately human. The human beings are the only creatures that have the capacity to say what love is, express it, and truly experience it in the way that God intended. Love is beautiful. Love and how it is experienced and expressed is something that only humanity can do and experience.
            What is it about watching a sunset, walking under snow covered trees at Christmastime, seeing the flowers bloom in the spring, riding horseback through the breath-taking mountains of Colorado, feeling the wind blow through your hair on beaches of Mexico, or just holding hands while sitting under the stars on a clear summer night that makes a person fall in love or want to fall in love? Why is it that these experiences are associated with love? Why is it that being outdoors in God’s beautiful creation stirs a desire for love, both to love and to be loved? It is possible that seeing and experiencing these things has a deeper effect on humanity than most would admit.
            Being outside and seeing God’s creation, for many people, stirs in their hearts the desire for love. Why? Well possibly because God created the world, and God is love. God loves every living thing that is on the earth, and if God created all of them in love then love itself is a part of creation. It seems only natural that when a person reflects on what God has made, that they will have a desire to love and be loved. Why would it not work that way? It is hard to imagine someone seeing the most beautiful sunset off the cost of Puerto Rico and then come away from it saying, “I’m bitter and angry towards the world.” Surely seeing a sunset or sunrise would stir something in their hearts that goes deeper than their own bitterness and hurt. When a person steps outside and truly admires the beautiful creation that God has blessed the world with, that love that is in creation shines through that and the innate desire for love shows itself.
Is not love something that every human desires? Whether or not it is admitted, or even acknowledged, and whether or not they ever actually “find love”, as culture commonly phrases it, it is something that is truly desired by all. Not only romantic love, but also, love from a friend, and ultimately, love from God; the love that surpasses all. Every part of God’s creation points to Him. He created the world to show his glory. Would it not be a slap in the face to God to say, “I hate ladybugs”, or “I don’t like it when I have to go outside”, because in a sense, that is saying, “God, I hate your creation.” Did God create the world so humanity could admire it from behind a glass window? No, he did not. God made creation to be experienced, and through creation he is glorified, and through his creation, he shows us love, and not just any love, the most beautiful love that exists. This love goes far beyond the stereotypical love of the latest romantic comedy. This love is the greatest love of all; it is a love that humanity will never be able to fully comprehend while on earth. Creation shows the love of God, a love which all desire, a love that is beautiful.
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Rainy College Days

Posted by Morgan
I love Lee's campus when it rains. I know most people hate those gloomy days, but I love them. I think a lot on rainy days. I love walking in the rain. For some reason rain makes me feel alive. I love feeling the rain hit my face. My new favorite thing since I've come to college has been running in the rain. It's rained a lot up here, it actually poured a couple of weeks ago. And guess what I did, I went running.
That week had been particularly hard for me personally, as I struggled, and continue to struggle, with what I'm doing here. I was really upset, about what I don't quite remember, and so I heard the rain begin to pour down and I was like, I'm going! So I did. I put my iPod in on shuffle, and I step out of the bottom door of my dorm and I took off running. It didn't take long before I was soaking wet. It was a pretty surreal time because in my head it was like a scene from a movie. I've got the music blaring in my ears and I'm running and I begin crying in the rain, and I'm talking to God, more like yelling at Him in my head. As soon as I started running I said, "Okay, God. I need some answers. I'm not going to stop running until I have some." Scary thing to say, right? Yeah tell me about it.
So I run, and I run, and I'm running all around campus and I'm soaking wet at this point. And I just kept asking God why.  Why in the world am I in college? What am I doing here? Why did You tell me to come here? Why haven't you told me what you want me to do? WHY, God, WHY?!?!?!?!?!? And the rain had stopped to a light sprinkle, and the clouds were starting to pull back as I ran over by the library. I sat down on one of the benches and kept praying and going God, is this really where you want me? And then I sat there, in tears, and I began listening to the song that was playing on my iPod. And it was a BarlowGirl song and this is what it said:
"Good morning
The night is over and gone
I thought once
This dark would last for so long
Feel the sunlight
On my face
You have brought me
Through this place

Jesus, Jesus You found me
Through the long night you led me
You set me free

Do you see
Just what you've done in my life?
You gave me
More then I hoped for; now I

Feel your sunlight
On my face
You have brought me
Through this place"


You Led Me by BarlowGirl




When I started listening to the song, it was on the first verse, and when it got to the pre-chorus of "feel your sunlight on my face" it was like something from a movie. I was sitting there listening to it...in tears, and when it said sunlight, the clouds pulled back on the sun shown right through the trees directly on to my face. The timing could have only been God. And then I listened to the song all the way through and I came out with the following conclusion.


God's brought me here. He's brought me to Lee, He's got a plan for me. I have no idea what that is, but hey, I know He directed me here. He clearly showed me that...and it was amazing! :) I love it when God shows me in ways like that...it's always so memorable.


Singing Harmony,


Morgan
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